I try not to argue with such folks. I remind myself that the fool is busy doing the same thing.

Usually, the fools in these circumstances are in an altered state. Once, a good friend of my daughter bumped into me, literally, on the sidewalk on the main street of town. I liked her, and she seemed to be suitable for my daughter.

We started to chat. The conversation seemed a bit off.  I noticed her eyes were unlike what I expected from a healthy pair. I asked her if she was ok. Her answer was not reassuring, not in words but in her delivery of her answer to my question. I concluded that she was high on something and therefore was not in the moment. She probably wouldn’t remember even meeting with me. I politely ended the conversation and headed home.

I have personally experienced a blackout that lasted several hours. I was told that I was up dancing, climbing stairs, and interacting with others during the blackout. My friends, who were with me all evening, never realized I was in a blackout stage. I was the fool that evening, even though I didn’t act like one. What a lot of pointless conversations I must have had.

Throughout my career, I have had the chance to speak with many adults under the influence of alcohol. Besides conversations to evaluate their health and risk factors, any meaningful discussion would need to wait at least 12 hours.

I try not to argue with close-minded people, except in one case. I might learn something, so I ask clarifying questions. My goal is to be sure I understand their position. It’s hopeless and a waste of time to expect they will do the same. 

Religion can be a sensitive subject. I keep mine private and rarely share my off-mainstream faith. It doesn’t have a common label, so explaining it takes time. I’ve honed a response to share over coffee when we both have the time. I’m rarely taken up on my offer. Though once I was, leading to several months of email discussions as we both tried to understand each other’s faith framework. 

Please take a moment to think about this. Are there people or topics in your life that you’ve learned not to have casual conversations with or about? Why did you come to this conclusion? Are there conversations you wish you could avoid, as they often turn into arguments? Are family members frequently part of this situation?

Please comment by sending me an email with your bit of a think. I am curious about your thoughts.

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glenn.walmsley@icloud.com