Blog
Ready or Not
Apr
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I recently heard about a group of women who called themselves The Ronettes. This stood for ‘Ready or Not.’
Come along with me down this rabbit hole. I promise you won’t die.
Speaking of dying, that is the group’s main focus. Dying. The members tend to be older, but the age range is broad, and their functioning levels are generally high. The one shared interest is their willingness to discuss end-of-life topics.
Here are several topics and questions they have raised.
There are annoying requirements if you want to donate your body to science. No contagious diseases, please. No manglements, either. You need to get under refrigeration within 4 hours. Who do you speak to in advance? Maybe there’s a bracelet for that – flash freeze within 4 hours, please and thank you.
If the members wanted a green burial, they would improve their chances significantly by considering passing away in the winter. Apparently, we don’t fare well in the summer heat.
Personally, I’ve silently chosen to ignore or deny my mortality. I now see the start of my 80s approaching in less than a couple of years, and denial becomes harder. Luckily, my wife, who is younger than I am, can remain in denial while occasionally visiting with me during my existential angst.
I’ve discussed my preferences for handling my remains, specifically the ashes. I want to leave funeral planning entirely to the living, as I think it is a healthy part of the initial grieving process. A good friend of mine, who recently passed away, was told he had just a few months to live. Part of his planning included organising a farewell get-together with his friends. It was a novel idea to me. If I have the time, I’d like to do that—no speeches, just good food, wine, and music. Some of my friends may choose not to attend, and I respect their individual decisions.
With luck, I’ll have a few items remaining on my bucket list when it’s my time to go. Life would be harder if it were empty.
Ready or not, my end will come, and I am striving to find the courage and comfort to speak openly with those who are comfortable discussing end-of-life matters. Perhaps I could add some conversation topics to my bucket list. What is my legacy, or do I even care about leaving one? What are my deepest fears and greatest vulnerabilities?
Please give this a bit of a think. Would you join a local Ronette group if there was one nearby? What would you hope to gain from being a member? Ready or not.
Please comment by sending me an email with your bit of a think. I am curious about your thoughts.
Photo by Strauss Western on Unsplash.
My Thanks to the Edmonton Journal for A Discussion of Demise.
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